I Don't Want to Lose You
by TML9115
Summary: Prompt: By Corvidprompts - "You're going to kill me. With emotions." "Suck it up." When Sara gets hurt on a mission, Ava is worried and wants to see for herself that Sara is alright.
1. Chapter 1

**Prompt** : By Corvidprompts - "You're going to kill me. With emotions."  
"Suck it up."

 **Summary** : When Sara gets hurt on a mission, Ava is worried and wants to see for herself that Sara is alright.

 **AN** : Established AvaLance. The instant I saw this prompt, I knew I had to write something and since the AvaLance bug has bit me, here is a short piece.

 _ **I Don't Want To Lose You**_

"Oh my god, Ava, babe, seriously, I'm fine, I swear." Sara wasn't sure how many times she'd repeated that she was okay but, Ava, being the over protective girlfriend that she was, would not take her word for it. She rolled her eyes as Ava took her face in her hands.

"I'll believe it when I see it for myself." Ava grabbed Sara's cheek turning her face to one side then the other. She used her other hand to move Sara's hair out of her face to check her hairline. Ava sighed when Sara tried once again to assure her she was fine. "Will you please just humor me." She pouted.

Sara stopped her fidgeting and allowed Ava to check her out. She could never deny Ava, not when she had that adorable pout on her face. Unfortunately for her, Ava knew that and that was the exact reason she was pouting at her now. She reached up and covered the hand Ava had on her cheek. "I really am fine but, if it'll make you feel better, go ahead." She turned her face into Ava's palm and kissed it. She let go of her hand and let the agent resume her search.

"Thank you." Ava smiled caressing Sara's cheek before moving her hands through Sara's hair checking for any cuts and bumps. When she was done checking her hair she smiled in satisfaction. She kissed Sara's forehead and took a step back. "Off with the shirt." She instructed. She watched Sara's face for any indication she was in pain as she lifted her arms to unbutton her blouse. She cringed at the pained expression on her girlfriend's face as she tried to take her arm out of its sleeve. "Sara, I'm so sorry, stop." She couldn't bear to be the cause of her pain. "Are you okay." She took a step closer taking a close look at her face.

"Would you believe me if I said I was." Sara asked, a small smile playing on her lips. She'd known Ava to worry but it had never been this bad. She blamed it on the fact that they'd been together for over six months and they no longer had to hide their relationship.

Ava chuckled. Sara was right, if she didn't see it for herself, she wouldn't truly believe Sara when she said she was fine. Sara tended to downplay her injuries as badly as she did. They were both terrible at admitting weakness. "No probably not."

"Help me," Sara asked.

Ava didn't need to be asked twice. She slid her hands across Sara's collarbone and onto her shoulders, guiding the blouse to fall off of her girlfriend's shoulders. She let out a small gasp at the bruises that were already appearing on Sara's skin. She traced her fingers across the marks and looked into Sara's eyes as tears welled up in hers.

"You're going to kill me. With emotions." Sara smiled cupping Ava's cheeks in her hands. She'd never seen the blonde display so much emotion, not while they were in public, and she considered the med bay on the Waverider very public. Her team didn't seem to know the meaning of the word privacy half the time, she was surprised they'd not been interrupted already.

"Suck it up." The words had triggered something inside her, something that had scared her more than anything she'd ever faced. Ava looked away, pulling Sara's hands away from her face and setting them at her side. She moved to look at Sara's right side where she'd known she'd been hit and ran her hand across the length of her side and back.

Ava's tone was serious and so Sara said nothing, instead, she allowed her to continue her assessment.

"I could've lost you," she said after a few minutes of silence.

"Ava," she started.

"I could've, don't you say otherwise." Ava interrupted before she could finish her sentence.

"Ava, what we do is dangerous, how many times have you gotten hurt," Sara asked, seriously. "There will be times that we get hurt, it's part of the job. And, I have Gideon." This was the first time either of them had gotten hurt while they'd been dating and Sara was glad it was her. She couldn't stand the thought of Ava getting injured.

"What if Gideon is not around to heal you, then what." It annoyed her that Sara thought so little of her own safety. She was constantly saving everyone else with little regard to her life. "I don't want to lose you," she whispered.

"Sweetie, I promise you I'm okay, I'm not going to die. It would take more than a few thugs with metal pipes to take me down." Ava had been really scared, she'd have to check with the team to see what they'd originally told Ava about the incident.

"But you already have." She abandoned her search of Sara's injuries and moved to stand between her legs. "Sara you've died several times, how many more times do you think you can cheat death, your body can't take that kind of repeated stress. What if the next time there is no bringing you back. I love you Sara, I don't know what I'd do if you died."

"You love me," Sara asked, it was the first time Ava had uttered those words to her. They'd always kept their relationship light, moving slow, not wanting to rush things.

Ava looked away feeling embarrassed. She couldn't believe she'd accidentally told Sara she loved her.

Sara reached out grabbing both of Ava's arms holding her in place. "You love me," she asked once again.

Ava sighed. "I do, very much and I'd really appreciate you not risking your life and dying on me."

"I promise to try harder Aves, because I love you too and I never want to see tears in those beautiful blue eyes, not ones caused by me, not again." She wiped the tear that had fallen against Ava's cheek. "I'm sorry I scared you, I promise to be more careful. How about we let Gideon work her magic and then you and I go enjoy a quiet evening at your place."

Ava grinned. "I'd like that very much."

 **AN:** As always, you can find me on tumblr or inbox me here. Thank you for reading.


	2. Chapter 2

**AN** : Thanks to a review, I decided to write this piece. Enjoy.

 _ **Chapter 2**_

Sara saw it all happening all too quickly, she was too far to do anything. She called out but Ava had was too distracted by the three men engaging her in hand to hand to notice the man coming behind her. It had been a long time since Sara had fully felt the blood lust this strongly. She fought every day to control it, but right now she let it take over. She needed to get to Ava and avoiding killing was not helping her get there quickly enough. She tore through the men surrounding her, ignoring the sound of bones snapping. She couldn't worry about that now, their death meant nothing, not when Ava's life was in the balance. She ran faster than she ever remembered running. Just a few more feet, she pushed past the burning muscles. Time slowed as if it were standing still. She called out to Ava once again trying to get her attention.

Ava turned to face the threat Sara was trying to warn her of but it was too late. Her body jerked backwards as several bullets pierced her abdomen and chest. She let out a cry of pain as her body flew back hitting the ground hard.

The blood lust within Sara went on overdrive as she tore apart the men that were left surrounding them. With the immediate threat having been taken care of she knelt down beside Ava. "Ava," she called out, her hands grabbing Ava's face. Her fingers slipped to the side of her neck checking for a pulse. Her chest tightened when she felt Ava's pulse. It was slow and weak. Too weak. "Ava please hold on. Ray, I need you at my location, now," she yelled into her comm. She pulled Ava's jacket apart to get a better look at the gunshot wounds. She counted at least four. "Come on Aves, fight, please fight," she begged her unconscious girlfriend. "Damn it Ray, where the hell are you," she screamed for him.

"I'm here," Ray told her, landing a few feet behind the pair. "What happened," he asked.

Sara didn't have time to answer him. She needed to get Ava to Gideon. "Get her to the Waverider."

"Sara." He tried again.

"Now Ray, go," she yelled. She ran after him to the ship. She needed to get to Ava, she couldn't lose her, not like this. She made it back to the ship several minutes after Ray and Ava. She sprinted to the medbay and stopped dead in her tracks. The look on Ray's face told her the one thing she'd dreaded since setting her eyes on Ava. "No, no, no." She cried moving to Ava's side. "Gideon, heal her," she yelled for the AI's help.

"I'm afraid Agent Sharpe's injuries were too severe."

"I don't give a damn how severe they are Gideon, help her." She cried. She pulled Ava to her chest, cradling her in her arms.

"I'm sorry Captain Lance." The AI apologized, her voice sad.

"Ava," Sara cried. "Ava please don't leave me. Please." She begged her girlfriend, her tears blurring her vision. "Please stay." She repeated over and over, hoping Ava would suddenly hear her and wake up. "I love you." She sobbed. "I love you so much, please don't leave." She continued to cry, her words becoming more and more garbled. She couldn't believe she'd let this happen. She should've been there, should've been closer. She should've kept her safe. She wasn't sure how much time passed before she let go of Ava. Setting her back down on the chair, she ran out of the room going to the jump ship. She got into the pilot's seat and tried starting the ignition several times and nothing happened. "Gideon." She had a feeling the AI had something to do with the jump ship's lack of power.

"Captain Lance." Gideon started but Sara wouldn't let her finish.

"Take me back Gideon." She ordered the AI.

"Captain Lance, you can't."

"No Gideon, not this time. Take me back." She yelled at the AI. "Take me back." She repeated slamming her hands against the controls. "Take me back." The tears that had stopped with the hope of going back in time and saving Ava returned. "Please Gideon." She pleaded. "I can't lose her Gideon. I can't lose another person that I love." Her tears flowed uncontrolled. "Please." She begged.

"I'm sorry Captain Lance." The AI apologized. "You know I cannot allow you to go back and change time. Ava would not want this."

Sara sobbed, feeling the walls close in around her as her world started to collapse. Her vision started to darken, her breathing becoming more labored. She tried to gasp for air but it wouldn't come. She cried out for Ava repeatedly before her vision went completely black.

Sara woke up gasping. "Ava," she called for her deceased girlfriend, remembering the earlier events of her death. As hard as she tried she couldn't catch her breath, her sobbing only making breathing harder. She jumped when a hand touched her shoulder.

"Sara, Sara breath."

Sara shook her head. Her mind was playing tricks on her. She didn't know how she'd handle the death of another loved one. It was all becoming too much.

"Come on Sara, breath for me."

"Ava," Sara stuttered.

"It's me. You're okay. You're okay." Ava assured Sara. "Come here." She pulled Sara to her. She was really worried, she'd never seen Sara like this. She'd woken up with her after a nightmare numerous times but it had never been like this. "I've got you," she whispered. She wrapped both arms around Sara holding her against her chest. "It was just a dream." She ran her fingers through Sara's hair. She hoped that whatever had scared Sara was in fact a nightmare and not a memory she was reliving. With all that Sara had been through, she wouldn't be surprised if it was the latter. "You want to talk about it," she asked after she felt Sara relax against her. "You don't have to." She told Sara after feeling her tense up.

Sara tightened her arms around Ava resting her head against her chest. She focused all her attention on Ava's heartbeat, repeatedly telling herself it hadn't been real. "I watched you die." Her breathing picked up. "I couldn't." She took a deep breath. "I couldn't save you."

"Oh Sara, sweetie, I'm fine." She assured her. "I'm alive. I'm safe, with you." Ava kissed the top of her head, rubbing her back soothingly.

Sara lay awake, cuddling with Ava, too afraid to close her eyes. Every time she closed them she'd see Ava's lifeless body.

"I'm okay." Ava told Sara every time she felt her tense.

"It felt so real." Sara breathes out. "I felt my world shatter around me."

"It wasn't real Sara." She reminded her.

"I know." She sighed. "Ava, I know you always are but, will you please be extra careful," she asked.

"Of course." She kissed the top of her head again. "Anything for you, love."

Sara nodded, once again relaxing. "I love you Aves. Next time I get a papercut and you want to fret over me, I give you my word, you won't get an argument from me." Ava fussing over her seemed like such a trivial thing now. If it would ease her girlfriend's mind, she'd let her coddle her and look over every inch of her body for injuries.

"I love you." Ava smiled. This was the longest Sara had gone without flinching or tensing. "Let's try and get some rest. I'll be here the whole time." She added before Sara could argue.

A part of her didn't want to go back to sleep in fear of seeing Ava die again, but knowing she'd be there if her nightmares returned helped. "Okay."

 **AN:** I hope y'all don't hate me, on the bright side, no one died.


End file.
